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My Best Motivational Tip

Journal Entry: Mon Mar 26, 2012, 5:01 PM
When I become overcome with the guilt and shame and fear as a result of my constant procrastination, I have one trick to get me off my ass that works every time.

Now, lots of other people and blogs and whatever are all like "look how lucky you are" and "puppies and rainbows" and "if you get it done now, you'll feel better" and lots of other positive shit. While all this stuff is true, I'm still playing Assassin's Creed II for like four hours a day. It doesn't motivate me at all. I still don't want to write a 500 word essay on the subtle differences between the book and the film adaptation of The Road that's due, like, tomorrow.

So here's what I think of.

"Michael Bay wants me to fail."

Insert your own celebrity arch nemesis if you want to, but basically choose someone so crap that it makes you angry. Preferably someone who's getting paid buckets of money to do whatever they do to piss you off.

Competitive nature and the desire to prove your chosen asshole wrong should take over.

Rob Liefeld or Stephanie Meyer or Michael Bay might very well want me to succeed, but I don't care. The lie works.

Add a Comment:
 
:iconhenchmen42:
Henchmen42 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
ROB LIEFELD. Normally that name is all I need to get motivated. If that hack can get paid then WHY CAN'T I. I actually know what feet look like. Is this on Tumblr so I can re-blog it? Or would you mind if I posted it as a quote with a click-through link to this? Because this is a good point and I know a lot of creators who could use all the motivation they can get.
Reply
:icongirl-on-the-moon:
Girl-on-the-Moon Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Root around on LydiaButz.tumblr, it shouldn't be too far back in my posts. :)
Reply
:iconhenchmen42:
Henchmen42 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
DONE.
Reply
:icongirl-on-the-moon:
Girl-on-the-Moon Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
AWESOME.
Reply
:iconthecalmofchaos:
TheCalmOfChaos Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I had that last semester... but with an art teacher. Honestly, my hate produce some pretty awesome art. And I always thought the Jedi had the real power. ;P
Reply
:iconsoracia:
Soracia Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2012
... Stephanie Meyer wants me to fail you say?

....

I MUST WRITE!
Reply
:iconmanycomics:
manycomics Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Rob Liefeld! Wow, I haven't heard that crap master's name in a long time.
Reply
:iconthealmightybuttcake:
thealmightybuttcake Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2012  Student Writer
This is amazing.
Reply
:iconchild-of-the-tardis:
Child-Of-The-Tardis Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2012
I hate people trying to cheer me up with mindless optimism when I'm howling my eyes out over the U and D in some of my subjects.
Reply
:icondannygyrrl:
dannygyrrl Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
OMG Russsel T. Davies wants me to fail!!!!!
Reply
:iconlitwolf689:
Litwolf689 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
...holy crap, that might just work for me. The very thought of 'Stephanie Meyer wants me to fail' made me want to jump up and get some work done. Bit too late for that now but I'm going to hang onto that tip for the morning. THANK YOU!
Reply
:iconmidnight-55:
midnight-55 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm gonna take a teenager-ish turn on this. My parents want me to fail XD which may or may not be true at this point in time XD
Awesome tip =^-^=
Reply
:iconmango33:
Mango33 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist
thanks, I'll use this for my stupid homework. Wait, wait, I mean....Rick Santorum's biggest dream is for me to flunk Algebra!
THERE.
Reply
:iconbigger-on-the-inside:
bigger-on-the-inside Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2012   General Artist
using that! XDDD
Reply
:iconphoenvix:
phoenvix Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
Joe Quesada wants me to fail.....OH HELL NO GURL!

Carrie
Reply
:iconelusivelyalive:
elusivelyalive Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
Holy shit. That's pretty damn good.
Reply
:iconvalerietoskodes:
ValerieToskodes Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Johnny Depp wants me to fail. And so do all the characters he's played.

This novel's gonna get done in a week.
Reply
:iconwildredrose14:
WildRedRose14 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
.........I kinda love you. :XD:
Joking...but you know......genius. :thumbsup:
Reply
:icondickywebster:
Dickywebster Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
I knew it! that miserable sod! :O
Actually that seems like it might work, especially with me =P
Reply
:iconhouseofdoom:
HouseofDoom Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Student General Artist
Whenever I feel sad or down, I remember that A) no matter how I look, Jack Harkness would bed me B) Stephenie Meyer gets a kitten every time I screw up, and C) Rick Santorum wants me to fail
Reply
:iconbazookoidben:
BazookoidBen Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
They all want me to fail....
I see it now...and your saying I should beat them....


...with a pool cue.

It all makes sense now.
Reply
:iconm-cap:
M-Cap Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
As a person who's suffering from constant procastinating and has troubles getting motivated, I think that this seems like a good advice. I'll try this out the next time I want to really do something but don't feel like it.
Reply
:iconwithoutavoice:
WithoutAVoice Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
:stare: I blame ALL the annoying fangirls in fandoms! The ones that ruin something I like.
Reply
:iconwithoutavoice:
WithoutAVoice Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
And I mean they want me to fail.
Reply
:iconstarburst27:
Starburst27 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
THIS IS INGENIOUS.
Reply
:icontothemaximumextreme:
Tothemaximumextreme Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This the best things ever
Reply
:icongrinedel:
grinedel Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
Doesn't wooooork! My exams are tomorrow and I'm still procrastinating... The internet wants me to fail and it's damn well suceeding
Reply
:iconcobizah:
Cobizah Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
The Associate Dean of my Medical School wants me to fail. DDD< No, no I won't.
Reply
:iconhullumel:
HulluMel Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Also: Rick Santorum wants me to fail!
Reply
:iconhullumel:
HulluMel Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
We're discussing The Road in class right now as a book. Later we're going to watch the film and compare it to the book, too, though.
Just a question about it since you've read it. What's your opinion on the end of the book? Do you like how it turned out or not? :)
Reply
:icongirl-on-the-moon:
Girl-on-the-Moon Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I think the end is nice. I mean, it's kind of the best ending a book like this could have. The boy getting a mother figure is supposed to be all meaningful and symbolic and stuff, but I just think its nice. I don't know how much I enjoy analyzing the crap out of books.
My teacher is convinced that the movie ending is FAR more hopeful than the book's ending, but to me they're nearly identical in hope levels.
Reply
:icontriumpha:
Triumpha Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Girl, this is so simple and so genius that I almost want to bow! :) Great tip!
Reply
:iconsilver786:
Silver786 Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Student Writer
It also works with some politicians. Thank you for this.

Nicolas Sarkozy wants me to fail.
:iconyaomingfaceplz:
Detective Conan, see you later, I finally heard my call of duty.
Reply
:iconterrara-antaria:
Terrara-antaria Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
Udina wants me to fail.

Hmmm... thank you.
Reply
:iconunbekanntespferd:
UnbekanntesPferd Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012
That... actually works, wow O.O
Great tipp, thanks XD
Reply
:iconsaratyler:
SaraTyler Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012
Oh my gosh, I love you right now.
"Stephenie Meyer wants me to fail" is going to go on my bedroom wall for seven months, at which point it will be transported on to my dorm-room wall. Bless you, child!!
Reply
:iconigcreator:
igcreator Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012
"Michael Bay wants you to fail" is now written on a hot pink post-it and is now on my laptop screen where my to-do list is. You, my dear, are a motivational genius.
Reply
:iconfrenchw1nter:
frenchw1nter Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Student General Artist
Oh my god. "Stephenie Meyer wants me to fail." :iconraegplz: I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS. /worksherbuttoff
Reply
:iconar-x-designs:
AR-X-DESIGNS Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Professional Filmographer
I wanted to be a helicopter pilot until one day in junior high school when my friends said this one girl drew better than me. Well...thank you girl I'll never remember the name of...now I can't turn it off!!!
Reply
:iconteribane:
teribane Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I just realized journals can be favorited.
This journal definitely merits one! >X3
Reply
:iconsonicalconverse:
SonicalConverse Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Student Artist
M.Night Shamamalama. For what he did to Avatar the Last Airbender :iconrageplz:
Reply
:iconlemurrific:
Lemurrific Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012
Oh gees... I think I found the guy to get pissed at...
Thanks! :XD:
Reply
:iconsonicalconverse:
SonicalConverse Featured By Owner Mar 27, 2012  Student Artist
It's my pleasure to spread the hate :stab:
Reply
:iconhofles:
Hofles Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012
Thanks!!!
Reply
:iconlightstorm456:
LightStorm456 Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Omg, now I do feel motivated to do my poetry essay (I was just gonna hang out on here for a bit) I'LL SHOW YOU TOM CRUISE!!
Reply
:iconsqueebone:
Squeebone Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I like it. I have this same problem, and happy crap never helps me in the slightest >.<

And Michael Bay DOES want you to fail.

So does Rob Liefeld.
Reply
:iconjado-the-shadow:
Jado-the-Shadow Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012
Oh, that is fantastic!
Reply
:iconswatchangel:
SwatchAngel Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Never thought of that, I'm going to try that next time.
Reply
:iconphinnimonster:
Phinnimonster Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012   General Artist
I like this. I will use this.
Reply
:iconthe-lady-harkness:
the-lady-harkness Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I tell myself this:

Moriarty will turn me into shoes! And not very good ones! He'll make me into Crocs!

and when that one doesn't work, i simply tell myself this:

.....If I don't get back to work they'll cancel Doctor Who. AGAIN.


those usually scare me back into doing whatever it was i'd put off.
Reply
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March 26, 2012
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